Living Your Life

There’s only one life to live. So why live a life that isn’t yours? I’ve always had an issue with people living a life that isn’t truly their own. A life dictated by others around them. A key factor I’ve come to understand in this is ambition. There are two types of ambition: inner ambition and outside ambition.

Outside ambition is shaped by the standards and goals that others set for you, the ones you eventually accept as your own. A top-tier school? A high-paying job? Wealth? These goals might seem like yours, but are they truly your own ambition, or are they dictated by outside forces?

Live the way you want to live your life. Intensely live the way you want to live your life. Don’t mistake "intensely" to mean recklessly abandoning all obligations not related to your goals. I used to think that’s what it meant. I thought it required sacrificing everything else. And if that’s how you want to live, then do it—as long as it’s your life. But for me, I’ve realized that isn’t my life. I was wrong.

On the topic of inner vs. outside ambition, I know someone about to finish their residency. Someone once asked them whether they’d do it all over again. Their answer? No. They said it wasn’t worth it. Was their life dictated by their own ambition, or was it by outside ambition?

The point isn’t to criticize how anyone else lives their life. I wouldn’t ever point out issues with the way someone is living—it’s weird, it’s fruitless, and it rarely changes anything. In fact, it might only push them further down the path they’re on. Instead, this serves as a reminder to myself, to check whether I’m living my life by my own ambition or letting others dictate it for me.